And They Flew

How bittersweet endings are... Today was the last day of school for my students and it was one emotional roller coaster ride for us all. I cannot even begin to say how amazing it is to think of how far they have all come and how hard they worked. That in itself brings tears to my eyes all over again. The willingness to learn has such an impact on a child's education and while I did have to poke and prod some along the way I am confident that they are all going on to 6th grade prepared for the challenge.

We celebrated with ice cream floats and a movie. We talked about our favorite adventures together and how proud they were of themselves. Finally at the end there were so many tears that it all has become a blur of my wonderful students hugs and I'll miss yous. When last bell finally rung I walked out with my 3rd round students and it really hit me that it was all over. I would never truly have a "first year" again. Yes, I may end up teaching different subjects or at new schools but I know that I will never have an experience quite like this again. I really could not have been more blessed this year. Don't get me wrong, we had our share of ups and downs. There were times when I wanted to throw in the towel and quit. There were even a few seconds of "Why did I choose teaching, isn't there something easier?".  All of those things have been replaced with happy memories and student success's. I suppose it's similar to how they say once you have a baby you forget the pain, you revel in their beauty and the world is right again.

For a fleeting moment this afternoon my world was perfect. I was basking in the glow of success and pending summertime. Reveling in the fact that I HAD done it. Somehow, I had survived my first year with no major battle scars. Then changes started happening and before I knew it I was being told that I just might be moving to language arts/social studies. Same grade but different subject. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy language arts but I sooooooo want to stay in math and science. I HATED, yes capital HATED, math until this year. Teaching it has been so wonderful. I love the rules and steps to reach a calculated answer. There is one right answer but so many ways to explore to get there. Science, well I have always enjoyed science. The projects and hands on experiments are so much fun and of course my students love it. More than anything it is heartbreaking that all of my hard work and hours upon hours of diligently planning are about to be thrown out. My ideas of how to build upon what I have and improve lessons. Plans for experiments and hands on math lessons.... Potentially all gone. Not to mention that I have spent thousands of dollars on math and science books and supplies. Luckily those things are mine to keep but it's dreadful to think that they were only used for a year.

I suppose the sensible side of me is trying to reason with the overly emotional side of me and is trying to say that it will be okay. That in light of all that is going on with the economy I do have a job. That in itself is a blessing. In the end I will do whatever I am asked to do. If it means regrouping and re planning then so be it. I can learn to love language arts and social studies as I do math and science. I CAN do this....

The teacher
said to the students:
"Come to the edge."
They replied: "We might fall."

The teacher again said:
"Come to the edge,"
and they responded:
"It's too high."

"Come to the edge,"
the teacher demanded.

And they came –
and the teacher pushed them,
and they
Flew.